Here's how I've been feeling about the upcoming holiday season:

Anxious about uncomfortable conversations I need to have.
Grief and sadness over so much loss this year, as well as with the holidays.
Wanting to find ways to still connect with people and traditions and stay safe.

Obviously there are many things vying for our attention these days: social media, news sources, opinions of friends and family, unsolicited text and phone messages, mailings and advertisements of all kinds.

You might be thinking… with all the crises happening in the world, what I’m eating is not really the priority right now.

I agree that it might feel strange to sign on for something that seems so off-topic.

It’s the Autumn Equinox, the moment that marks marks the last day of the sun’s domination. While this is a time of abundance, from here out, slowly but surely, the nights will lengthen and the days will (eventually) get cooler.

Autumn is a tricky season for the digestive system, and with the stress of the pandemic along with puffy eyes and irritated sinuses from the smoke, our bodies could really use a re-set.

Grief is a funny thing.

There are many myths and misconceptions around grief and grieving, as well as incongruities in our thinking about it.

Here are a few things to chew on and help you spot any hidden Grief Beliefs:

How are you doing? What's happening in your world? What are you listening to, watching, reading? What's making your day better?

I have some announcements below, but first, a story.

If you are like me, on top of all of the other devastation last week from the California fires, your heart broke even more at the reports of California’s oldest redwood forest being destroyed in the blazes. Big Basin Redwoods State Park was described earlier this week as “gone.”

The response from the past few missives tells me that it can be really helpful to name what’s been happening in our lives in terms like grief and loss.

Here's another aspect of this emotional puzzle you may relate to: anticipatory grief.

This week I made a Monotony Survival Guide for myself.

It could also be called Reminders for Nervous System Freak Out or Cabin Fever. It is similar to the Invisible Loss Guide.

It dawned on me last week that there’s a nuance to why life is so stressful in these days of the pandemic: We are all trying to avoid something that is invisible.

On the mat, is your approach to your practice and your body fortifying? It's possible, dare I say not uncommon, for us to actually harm, hurt, let down, neglect or discourage (all antonyms of fortify) ourselves physically, spiritually or psychically on the mat. We have been well-trained to do so (no pain, no gain).

What would it be like to use the question, "Does this fortify me?" as you move through an asana (pose) practice? Let that inform the decisions you make.

And right now, Shiva is dancing wild, hair whirling, flames flying, trampling on the demon of ignorance.

The fire of fighting for justice has been burning for centuries. This is a time of staggering pain and requires all of us to participate. In particular, white folks have work to do.

Forever I have told myself that "the spiritual path is hard."

Taking the "high road," deep interior focus, doing the pickaxe work of facing false ego stories and programmed identity -- all hard. I've worn this like a badge.

Commit your attention and take action, increase your knowledge and understanding through this awareness, and then surrender.

This is the wisdom of Patanjali’s Sutra 2.1: tapah svadhyaya ishvara-pranidhana kriya-yogah

This means...

Here's the message that is running through my head on repeat:

You can't do it by trying harder.

Whether it's a yoga pose or healing a heart.

Many of us are wanting individual holding, to be witnessed and supported through our specific experience. If that is you, I'd love to be with you in that way. Let's get your nervous system regulated so that everything else is not as hard…

So there's a learning curve to this technology thing :)

Let's go into a little more detail on how to find the morning meditations:

In response to some requests I’ve been getting, I’m excited to share two regulation tools, immediately available. Things are really hard right now. Scary, confusing, disappointing, frustrating and so much more. So much unknown. We all know panic doesn’t help your immune system, nor your state of mind.

A lot of people, likely including you, are having to make hard decisions right now.

Should we cancel the trip?
Should I keep my kid home?