When things don't go as planned
January 1, 2021. I sat on the couch in my favorite sunny spot and wrote down my dreams and wishes for the coming year.
While I don’t do “resolutions,” I do like to have dreams and goals to work toward.
These are actual things from that list:
Re/establish It’s All Yoga
Start quarterly planning
More free and low-cost offerings
More non-work time
The thing about goals is they are done or not done.
You can check the box, or you can’t.
Once a goal is completed, we tend to think it’s over and don’t give much consideration to how to maintain or nurture the results. Goals also don’t leave much room for out-of-the-blue changes in The Plan.
Last year is a great example of this. January 1, I had no idea what was coming in even the next couple of weeks:
The house we were moving into fell through
I was diagnosed with cancer
A hysterectomy was scheduled before the end of the month
NOT what I had planned!
The things on my dreams and goals list went to the wayside really quickly. All my energy and focus was on a new reality, preparing for a surgery and then recovering from surgery (along with life without ovaries).
This is where the Values list comes in.
Values are guiding principles, filters through which we can make decisions. Balm for difficult times.
Through the filters of my values, I could step through the unexpected and feel guided rather than abandoned.
I could let go of my goals, at least temporarily.
I could adapt and see the larger picture.
I could be realistic about what needed to happen short-term and how to take care of myself.
In the first weekend of every teacher training I’ve ever offered, we’ve done a Values exercise. For some people, it was the first time they thought about their values. For other people, it was a chance to revisit and reevaluate what’s important to them.
It’s a simple but profound exercise to help clarify:
What are you giving your energy, time and money to?
Where are you placing too much value?
Where are you undervaluing yourself?
Are you in alignment with yourself?
When we are clear about our values, we feel guided and connected, rather than trying to force or second-guess.
So rather than living (and failing) by resolutions, let's be guided by our deep values.
If this is up your alley, I invite you to my Values Recovery Workshop this Saturday.
I've led hundreds of people through this exercise and I've seen how defining your values can help bring more meaning, purpose and connection into your life. I hope you'll join me.
