3 Things I Learned on Retreat
Just back from hosting my first in-person retreat in over three years. What a delight to be together in the flesh again! There were so many special moments during the weekend -- laughter, tears and epiphanies.
With my teacher hat on, three things struck me that I thought you might want to hear.
1. What we really want, even though we might not know it, is connection.
There were several women on the retreat who came for solitude, alone time, and "time for myself," as stated in the pre-retreat intention questionnaire.
But in our closing circle, most of the women felt that one of the greatest gifts of the retreat was connecting with other incredible women on a deep level. It was a diverse age and background range, so the mix of perspectives and experiences brought both wisdom and freshness.
In my work, I consistently hear women say connection isn't something they are looking for, yet when they get it, it's more satisfying and nourishing than their favorite meal.
2. If you stop doing something, you stop being able to do it.
I've been talking about this for a while, as it has been a humbling lesson in my own body over the last couple of decades. Surgeries, injuries, life events have changed my activity level and yoga practice in different ways many times over. I have highlighted ways my body has changed and poses I can no longer do, and for the most part I am perfectly fine with that. There are different seasons in this life and for this human body.
At the same time… I can see how easy it would be for something like the ability to get up off of the floor to slip away. In a recent Oprah article, a "longevity doctor" talks about what keeps us healthy as we travel through the decades. His invitation is this: Pick 10 things you want to be able to do when you're 100, and train for them now and forever. Ideas include picking a young child up off the floor, climbing four flights of stairs, and hiking a hilly trail. He calls it the Centenarian Decathalon. It's a great article. (If you want more, I recently heard him on this podcast as well.)
How does this relate to yoga? Well, maybe you've lost your yoga mojo, or you've been practicing at home and taking the easy out. When you stop stretching your capacity, that capacity shrinks.
Which leads to the last one...
3. I say this with so much love... In the past three years of the pandemic, your form has suffered.
Of course it has! We went from weekly classes in person with a yoga teacher looking at your three-dimensional body, to a whirlwind of virtual / hybrid / distanced / masked and everyone just trying to figure out what is happening.
Maybe you've been on zoom, doing your best with virtual instructions. Maybe your favorite studio closed or your favorite teacher is gone. Or maybe you have been at in-person classes, but teaching has changed and, for many reasons, there's less attention to nuance.
I'm not talking about form for the sake of form, or a right and wrong way to do a pose. I’m talking about the deepening of unhelpful patterns that can exist in every body – scrunched-up shoulders, clenched buttocks, pushing from the middle back. Without someone’s gentle gaze and loving reminders, it’s easy to slip into those old grooves.
Ironically, some of the misalignment comes from wanting to do the pose “right.“ Striving commonly recruits unnecessary parts of the body or creates tension in the very places we're trying so hard to release.
May this be received as an exhale of softness across your shoulders
Our bodies have been through a lot. The fear, the unknown, the polarization all brewing in a big pot for the past three years, up to now and whatever your post-pandemic position is -- all of those experiences were processed (or not) through your body.
If you crave more support in your practice, see below for an invitation.
I love my online practice and studio... and it was glorious to be together in person. I wish you the joy of loving your practice and ease and helpful alignment in it :)